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The first thing I want to say is that it terrifies me that people are capable of thinking so darkly. With that being said, Colleen Hoover, you scare me.

Now onto my thoughts about the book. Having read three other CoHo books (November 9, Reminders of Him and It Ends With Us) I thought I knew what to expect in this book. A story that starts off fairly normal, with dashes of romance and a huge plot twist in the third act before the story wraps up nicely. That is NOT the formula this book followed.

After reading the first sentence of the book, I knew I wasn’t ready for what I was about to read.

“I hear the crack of his skull before the spattering of blood reaches me.”

This line alone sets the ominous tone for the rest of the book. As I progressed further and further, I became just as anxious as Lowen. Every sound and interaction became foreshadowing to something sinister waiting to come out.

If you haven’t read this yet and don’t want any spoilers, I suggest you stop reading now.

Some big points in the book I want to address…

  1. I will not argue that if I saw a video of myself sleepwalking, standing as still as a statue for an hour before launching myself to the ground, breaking my wrist and not feeling any of it until I woke up would terrify me. But I really thought Lowen had a darker past than that and after hearing everything else it seemed really insignificant and small. I’m not sure her character needed that, but it did bring some more ominous tones out in the book and came in handy for the scene when she woke up in Verity’s bed.

    1. Can we also talk about her being lowkey crazy herself and basically reenacting the sex scenes she read about with Jeremy in real life?? Like no I don’t think we should be biting down on the headboard and definitely NOT in the exact same spot where his wife’s are ingrained?? Anyway…

  2. I smelled Jeremy from miles away. I don’t know why, maybe I just didn’t trust any of the characters in this book, but I just feel like besides what we learned from the manuscript, we didn’t really know him at all. Towards the end he was giving me vibes of John Stamos in an episode of Law and Order: SVU where he played a reproductive abuser. It seemed like Jeremey was also a little crazy and possibly(?) already knew what Verity did and instead of grieving about losing 2 children and then killing his wife, he impregnates another woman. Very much ick, but obviously fit the story line so it’s not completely out of the realm of possibility

  3. Speaking of not trusting any characters, can we talk about Crew? We know Verity was speaking to him while pretending to be injured to everyone else, but we never find out if she told him to hurt himself when the grown ups start to question him. The first time I believe was an accident (falling off the bed with the knife), but the second time when he was eating with Lowen and actively bites down on the knife causing himself to get 6 stiches is fucking crazy. If she did tell her son to hurt himself then she’s just as crazy as I thought she was, but the fact that a 5 year-old would do that is beyond me. He seemed very much like a spy for Verity and I didn’t trust him at all. He already needed therapy for the other messed up stuff that happened in his life, but that added to a whole ‘nother level.

  4. And Verity. Sis, I’m not really sure how you thought this was going to play out. I can almost understand the journalistic writing style to cope with the devastating loss she went through, but writing verbatim important moments in your life and twisting them into something so evil, using the same names and everything is definitely something you should tell someone about. Preferably your husband so he doesn’t think you’re a psychopath and kill you. Oh wait…

Anyways, I’ve gone back and forth now for a bit about which version of Verity I believe because CoHo, being the brilliant writer that she is, made me question it for a while, but at this moment in time I have to believe the manuscript was real. Here’s the only tangible reason I can explain it; anyone that’s extreme enough to fake extensive injuries like that for months on end has to be crazy.

Overall, I thought this book was great. It made me anxious every time Lowen was left alone and while I expected there to be more interaction and possibly fighting between the two, I was on the edge of my couch reading this. This was the perfect book to set the spooky mood of October and I can officially check this one off the CoHo list!

Book Rating: 5/5

Spice Rating: 3/5

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